It’s Happening Again…

I try to keep abreast of stuff and have come to realize that many of those things I’d thought it safe to trust and upon which I had come to rely in my everyday kitchen life have been leading a double life: they were neither as once advertised, nor entirely honest in their dealings with me. They have fallen into the sear, the yellow leaf, and that which should accompany their old age, as honour, love, obedience and troops of like but aged implements, I must not look to keep. (Sorry Macbeth)

I am old now, so my memory is chunky -clogged to say the least- but my more recent concerns seem to stem from my over-reliance on my kitchen microwave to cleanse the kitchen like a maid, or whatever; it was the subject of one of my recent essays in fact.[i] Oh, I got a good deal on the microwave at the time, I suppose, and on wifely insistence bought the type which featured a dial, rather than digital numerals on its public face. Since it is still working after all the ceremony of the marriage meals, and its decision to carry on when the load was cut in half, I felt betrayed when I realized there had been no full disclosure of its inadequacies. Still, I continued to accept it as a fellow straggler on my post-connubial journey.

I filed my concerns -nay, my knowledge- in my back neurons as I continued to eke out an existence in an increasingly unfriendly kitchen. Octogenerianship, comes with a certain amount of wisdom, I suppose, but kitchens, like people, deteriorate with age; since I cannot fix the innards thereof, I feel it is incumbent on me to buy new gadgets as the old ones I once understood, slip unsung into the trash. Still, there are instructions on the new containers that help with such transitions.

Of course there are some new purchases that don’t need to come with manuals, and even if they did, I would likely throw them away without reading them. I mean, who would feel the need to refresh their knowledge about kitchen sponges? They wipe stuff up, or off as the case may be; if you have to read about them, maybe a maid would be a better idea -I’ve tried wives, but for some reason they quickly lose patience with my stumbling about the kitchen and either dropping, or breaking things; oh, and forgetting to put salt in the water for the pasta, or not restocking the fridge. No, I think I’m better alone. I don’t listen to my complaints, and I am free to swear if it suits me.

But back to the kitchen sponges. I am positively religious about using them with lots of detergent and hot water on whatever surface I deem needy; I always -well, usually always- rinse them well, and then place them on the also well-sponged stainless steel shelf-thing by the sink. I mean they have a coddled, cleanly life for inanimates.

Still, I wonder if I should stop reading the apps on my phone when they threaten my way of life. For example an article in the Smithsonian Magazine[ii] (that I was click-baited into by the picture of a gorgeous soapy sponge like the one I use) informed me that ‘a sponge is a better incubator for diverse bacterial communities than a laboratory petri dish… researchers distributed different strains of E. coli onto plates with different numbers of wells, which functioned as isolated compartments. The large wells allowed microbial species to mix freely, while the small wells let species keep to themselves.’

All provided adequate housing for illegal immigrants, I suppose, but although it was a well-intentioned diplomatic gesture to placate our some-time adversaries, ‘The scientists found that a moderate level of physical separation, similar to the porous structure of a kitchen sponge, allowed both kinds of bacteria—those that live in groups and those that live alone—to thrive… [but] in addition to its holey structure, a sponge also provides a damp environment that is full of food particles.’ Come on, eh? I risk severe skin damage when I rinse my sponge in really hot water. Still, a microbiologist in Germany who looked at the data (not mine) opined that although there’s hardly any sterile surface at home, the kitchen sponge is probably the most densely populated item in the room. Damn! This was not good news.

Still, never content with one source for the answer, I discovered that there seems to be some scientific disagreement about how dangerous sponges are, and whether or not microwaving them is helpful. So, rubbing my hands gleefully, I kept looking. Hoping.

I discovered that the various reported studies I had quoted were carefully scrutinized, including the supplemental material, by Jennifer Quinlan a food microbiologist at Drexel University. She found their methods were ‘vague’. She says that microwaving the sponge will knock down the bacteria living in it by about a million-fold. Of course, this method will leave many still alive since there are billions in the sponge, but the heat targets the dangerous ones. “It doesn’t sterilize the sponge,” she says. “But remember, the bacteria we want to kill are the ones that will make you sick.”

The main take aways are common sense precautions, although she doesn’t put it quite this way: search the Google literature until you find advice that fits more comfortably in your confirmation bubble[iii]: keep the sponges away from raw meat (too many bad actors there); replace the sponges regularly (buy a whole bunch and then wait for somebody to put them on sale again); and then (blush) clean the sponge every day or so in either the heated dry-cycle of a dishwasher (actually I don’t have one that works), or for a minute or two on high in -yes- the microwave. Uhmm, who to believe?

At least the advice, although hardly congruent, seems to come full circle though, eh? Well, one out of three is pretty good I guess: I don’t wipe raw meat with my sponge… Ever!

Still, I feel guilty about disseminating contestable and contradictory health views in my essays without final answers being firmly established. But maybe the wishy-washy (sorry) recommendations are real-time indications that we’re living through what Thomas Kuhn, the historian and philosopher of science, described as a paradigm shift. Maybe microwave ovens can once again be taken off the back-burner, as it were, and seen for what they really can do for us.

For me, however, a microwave is mainly for popcorn and defrosting stuff from my freezer; I live alone and don’t have to argue about when and what I choose to defrost; I don’t have to wipe my kitchen with anybody…


[i] https://musingsonretirementblog.com/2025/06/01/unquiet-meals-make-ill-digestions/

[ii] https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/why-your-kitchen-sponge-is-the-ideal-home-for-bacteria-180979668/

[iii] https://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2017/09/11/548926054/can-you-really-not-clean-your-kitchen-sponge

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